Tuesday, October 26, 2010

The Goat Chronicles: Tree + Goat = Physical Therapy.

I’m not really an animal person.
But, for some reason I seem to be
surrounded by them. They flock to me.

Maybe it’s a gift or maybe I stink and
they’re attracted to my stinch. Hmm.
Nonetheless, I’ve accepted my gift.

However, animals need to know that
it is just not safe around here.
Country life is not for the weak of heart.
You’ve got to have some banker smarts
and cowboy grit. I am convinced that
these animals have none.

This is Ruby. You met her earlier this summer.
This was her second rescue from that tree. Not
smart. This little episode led to 4 days
of physical therapy provided by Hubs.
She was thrilled with her progress.
So was Hubs.

But this is where our story turns sad.
One afternoon, during her
therapy session, her brother, Max,
turned ill and quickly passed. Just like that.
As goats are prone to do. We mourned his
loss and quickly realized that Ruby needed
a companion; and so, who better to
keep her company than her Momma?
We’ve named her Lucy. She’s very social,

but sets a bad example. 

I should have been a city girl.

Blog ya later, Missy

Friday, October 22, 2010

A Tale of Two Brothers.

Have I ever told you all the Buffalo Story?
I haven’t? Then grab a seat. You’re gonna love this one.

I’ve told you about our odd neighbors the “Walkers”, but I haven’t told
you about the one’s who live across the street. They built a house across from us
maybe10 years ago. Since that time they have added a deer farm
which also used to include a buffalo.

Now we live in a rural area, but all of the different deer and the buffalo
became quite the site to see and even today attracts all sorts of looky loos.

Anyway, about three years ago when my boys were babies (4 & 6) they became
completely enamored with these animals. I was always catching them down by
the fence trying to feed the deer, or even on one occasion taunting the
buffalo! I didn’t think we’d ever get them to stay away from them.

On one particular spring day, I had to go to the hospital for a meeting.
As I came home, I topped the hill in front of our house, and saw both of the boys hiding alongside the road, between the fence and a skinny forked tree. I assumed they were either hiding from me, or the neighbors. I pulled up to them. Rolled down the window and the best conversation ever took place.

 “What are you two doing?” I ask. Owen quickly leans out from the left side of the forked tree and states matter of factly “Twyin’ not to be seen.” And just as quickly returns to his hiding spot. “By who?” I dryly ask. This time Josh answers.  Leaning from his hiding spot on the right, and with both of his arms in the air he exclaims, “The buffawo!”  Then he too, hides again. As you can imagine, this was not at all what I expected to hear. Having looked around for the buffalo and not finding him I naively ask, “Where’s the buffalo?” Josh didn’t miss a beat and just the same way as he did before exclaims “In our yawd!”

Didn’t see that one coming either.

Yep. That buffalo had gotten loose and had been wandering around our
yard. But thankfully, at that point he’d been contained by my father in law.
But my boys, they weren’t taking any chances.

I love that memory. It still makes me laugh when I think about it. I hope it made you
laugh too.

Around the time of the buffalo story.

Blog ya later, Missy

Thursday, October 21, 2010

Wednesday, October 20, 2010

A Blonde Moment.

I must confess something.

But before I do let me just make
a small plea in my behalf.

I am a good woman. Most of
time. I am a good mother, too.
At least when I’m not yelling.
Now I’m not mother of the
year, but I’m not like Cinderella’s
evil step mother either.

But, I am absolutely without a doubt
the best. Aunt. Ever!
Hands down. No contest. Just ask
my nieces and nephews. (I’ve got
oodles of them)

That is, until today. Today, I failed
MISERABLY. Today, while waiting
outside of my baby’s classroom to speak
with his teacher for P/T conference, I see
my sister-in-law approaching.

Completely confused as to who she would
be there for, the following conversation
took place.

Me: “Hey Mandy. Who ya here for?”
Mandy: “Uh Dylan.”
Me: “Oh yeah. Um…” (Stumbling to recover)
SIL who now hates me: “You know they
                                      are the same age.”
Me: “I know it’s just I always think he’s
        Owen’s age.”
SIL who has now removed me from their Christmas
Card list: SILENCE

I know. Lame. How could I?
Only excuse. I have four kids.
They suck all my brain cells.

And so, that is it. My big, huge
blonde moment. And in one single
second I am out of the running for
Aunt of the Year.

And so I make my plea
please forgive me Bryton
Andy Lexi Emma Lindsey
Jimmy Layken Logan Brandon
Dasia Kenzie Landon Emily
Aiden Gavin Ashley Zoe Kamen
Kaden Kiana Amanda Whitney
Tanner Morgan …….Oh dear.



Blog ya later,

Saturday, October 16, 2010

Tooty Fruity. Sassy Frass.

This is a post about sassin.
I’ve been noticin’a lot of it
around here lately and so I’ve
decided to nip it in the bud.
But before I do let me share some
examples with you.

This is Spousal Sass.

It’s Hubs. He’s makin’ fun of my blog
to the Brother. Only, he couldn’t take
the heat when I whipped out my trusty
camera and caught his sassin’on film.

He was all like “O Miss. Please don’t
don’t make a blog about me bein’ a
sassy pants. I won’t do it any more.
Your blog is the best. It’ll go global
sometime next year. And blah. Blah. Blah.”

An if he keeps that up
he may loose his role as first editor.
He’s been warned.

And this here. This is Teen Sass.

Can’t you almost see the head cock to the side followed by

the eye roll and a "whatever" thrown in for dramatic effect?
Sheesh. Please.
I had that mastered at her age.

And finally we'll be discussin'
Punk Sass.


It's unmistakeable.  Every parent deals with it.
It's an epidemic really.  Tsk.  Tsk.  What's
a mother to do?
Now I know why some animals eat their young.

Until next time.

Blog ya later,

Friday, October 15, 2010

Honey, I'm home!

Helloooo strangers!! Where have you been all week?

What? It wasn’t you that was gone?
It was me. I’m soo glad you noticed.

I wish I had a really fabulous post for you.
But, I don’t. Sorry. I’ve thought and thought
for the last couple of days and nothin.

I thought about telling you all about how boring
the long drive home from Michigan was. And how
I had long and meaningful conversations by phone with
each of my siblings. And I’m pretty sure we solved some
major world problems. And that when I got home there
was not one single soul there to greet me. Not one. I mean.
I didn’t expect a police escort or anything, but I was
gone for like forever. No one even left the porch light on
for me (they would not make good Motel 8 employees).
I was bummed. But it didn’t take long for
the troops to start straggling in and all of their hugs
and kisses made up for their lack of hospitality.

But when I thought about it, I decided that would be
a super boring post. And that I would loose half
of my followers. Which if you check the count
over there to your right. Is only 10. Sad. I know. The other
five would only stick around cause their family. And
they know I’d make ‘em sorry.

I even thought about telling you about the funny things
that I’ve been over hearing around my house lately. Like
yesterday when Meghan wanted me to sign a blood donation
consent and I told her that she didn’t need the Aphoresis part
signed. Josh says “Meghan, no one says that any more.”
Where does he get it? That boy makes me laugh, and cry, and tired.
He’s a well rounded individual.

But then I decided it was probably one of those had to be there moments.
And I was struck by amnesia and couldn’t think of anything
else anyway.


I hate when that happens.

Lastly, I thought I’d tell you about cleaning out our basement.
That place was a pit. It looked like a scene from hoarders.
I’m not even kidding. We got rid of one box spring, 3 mattresses,
a dresser, two bed frames, oodles and oodles of junk, and
that has barely scratched the surface. Well, not really. It’s
a big improvement. But there’s still lots more
to go.

But I’m sure you all don’t want to hear about my basement.
I mean you came here to learn about important stuff.

Like how much snot was produced by nose during
those three days. It was annoying. I’m sure I broke some
sort of record. Actually, it was disgusting. I won’t
share any details. All I’m gonna say is, I’m really
glad Hubs loves me. Cause seeing a girl in that kind
of state would end any budding romance.


So you see? I’m in a pickle. I just can’t think
of one thing to write about. Unless you’d like
to hear about…never mind. I mean. I do want
you all to return.

Blog ya later,

Sunday, October 3, 2010

The Silence is Deafening.

What's a mother of 4 to do when she's
all alone in an unfamiliar city? 

So many times when I've been feeling
tired, frustrated, and ready to throw in the
towel I've wanted to run away.  Not for
forever, just  for a few days.  Rent a hotel
room.  Order a pizza.  And sleep for as long
as I want.  Watch whatever I want.  And
come back home all fresh and renewed.

But now that I'm here it's not quite what
I thought it would be.  The silence is much
too loud, there's nothing to watch, and
Pizza Hut doesn't deliver.  (Can you
believe that?!)

No, I haven't ran away.  Just doing some
training for work.  I'll be gone most
of the week.

And so, I've been having conversations
with myself all day about what I'm gonna
do with myself all week when classes are done
for the day. 

And I must admit this country girl is a bit
intimidated by the big city.  I'm a scaredy cat,
chicken, wimp.  Can't deny it.
There's not one adventurous bone to be found
anywhere in my body.  If it had been
left up to me America would've never been discovered.
And Hubs can forget having me as a
partner in The Amazing Race.

And so I sit here.  In my hotel room.
On my bed, watching Battle of the
Blades.  It's a Canadian show. 
Not too bad really.  They've paired ex hockey
players with professional ice skaters.  The
success of a routine, in my opinion comes down
to their choice of music. 

Tomorrow I will probably venture out
after classes.  Not sure where yet.
But before I go home, I plan
on stopping by the Detriot Michigan
Temple to get some pictures with
the awesome camera Hubs got
for me awhile ago.

Anywhoo, guess thats all for now.
Just so you know, I've only called home
twice since I've been here.  And twice
it was really, really quiet.  What's up
with that?
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